On August 23rd, my life was set in constant motion. After a summer that took everything out of me, I couldn’t wait to escape to the hills of Rwanda, to immerse myself in something so distant from my life in Seattle. I stepped onto my flight with so many different expectations of what I would encounter within the next month, and while some were right, I was constantly caught off guard. There are many things people say about studying abroad: “best experience of my life,” “I learned so much,” and even “I wouldn’t change a thing.” So many testimonials prepare you for what is going to be the moment your life will change, and they’re all right. But they’re not substantive. In my month abroad, I picked up on some “untold” aspects of studying in a different country and why it changes you. So without further ado, welcome to Rayyan Salam’s Quick Guide to Things Not Discussed.
Constantly Being Around People
What study abroad alum doesn’t tell you is how swarmed you are with people—all the time. Unless you consciously take time for yourself, you’ll be around someone every second of the day. Whether it’s the locals, other students, or your roommates, you’re never alone. If you’re introverted and sincerely freaking out, let me assure you, this is not a bad thing. The best part of being around people all the time is that it’s usually never awkward. Your conversations always seem to flourish, and somehow, you will literally never run out of things to say. Whether it’s debriefing the day or talking about school, your major, or your life. Or even having an intense debate about why Conrad is obviously the right pick for Belly, there’s always going to be something to talk about.
Immersive (and Intensive) Research
Another thing no one seemed to tell me was how often I would zone out, thinking about different ways that normal things connect to what I’m studying. In an early fall program, you’re going to be so immersed in what you’re studying that everything revolves around it. The concept of American democracy will be rebuilt in your mind. Education systems will shift, hospitals will change, and even sports will become something political. This immersive experience follows you back home like a shadow, haunting your everyday life. When I got back to Seattle, the change in my thinking was noticeable. I was asking more questions, explaining more things, and getting mad at my sister for using plastic water bottles (shoutout Prof. Gardner!). All this to say, immersing yourself in intensive research changes the way you view the world; you’ll never be able to see society the same. You’ll forever be the borderline annoying (but incredibly cool) intellectual.
The Summer I Turned Pretty
This one is a specific example of a broad topic. The Summer I Turned Pretty was Rwanda’s #1 show when we studied there. Unexpected, right? I thought so too. What’s special about studying abroad is that things you don’t think will connect you end up connecting you to everyone. I had discussions of the better brother with UW students, students from the African Leadership University, and even the worker in our apartment market. Another thing that connected us was a debate of Rihanna vs. Beyonce, which had a correct answer btw (Riri obvi). Small niche things will connect you, so don’t be afraid to speak your truth and divulge in interests you think might be just yours. Chances are, they’re not.
How You Perceive Yourself Abroad
Diving into a bit of a deeper topic, your perception of yourself abroad changes. Personally, I stepped into study abroad ready to leave Seattle behind for three weeks. I walked onto the plane thinking about how no one I was traveling with knew who I was. It was thrilling and it was horrifying. I won’t go as far as to say that I found myself abroad; however, I figured out that things I didn’t think defined me turned out to be the most important parts of me. I felt connected to my roots, proud to be who I was, unafraid to enjoy school, and confident in what I believed in. The peers that surrounded me were accepting of every bit about me and weren’t afraid to call me out if I messed up. I’m so grateful for that because they uplifted my perception of who I was. When I left Seattle feeling lost and insecure, I came back feeling a bit more confident in who I was.
It’s a bit counterintuitive to think about because, at the same time you’re learning to be confident in yourself, you’re also being othered. When you’re abroad, you’re abroad. Locals know that you’re tourists, and you know that they know. Being othered by locals, though, makes a lot less of a difference than you think. As long as you step in with an open mind, knowing that you’re there to study, and are willing to make mistakes, you won’t feel too bothered by being a foreigner.
Prioritize Your Health
When I was in Rwanda…I went to a dentist. The second week of the trip, my mouth was struck with an intense tooth pain that by Friday had half my face swollen. I ended up missing out on two things that I was looking forward to the entire trip. While my infection was, given, a very extreme example, if I had told someone about the pain at the beginning of the week, I might’ve been able to go to both the events. Prioritizing your health means sleeping well, eating better, and being aware of anything that might be wrong. I hope none of you reading this ever has half your face swollen and needs to take over-the-counter antibiotics in a different country; however, that’s only avoided if you prioritize your health. Stay safe, and you won’t miss out on anything.
The Quiet That Comes When You Get Back
This one is hard. Honestly, I’m still coming to terms with it. Allow me to lay it out. You step off the plane, and immediately you’re meeting new people. Once you get ice-breakers out of the way, you’re learning about the country, then more about each other, more about the country again, and then about politics and democracy and whatever your study abroad focuses on. To reiterate above, you’re constantly in conversation, around people, and whenever you have a thought, you can just turn your head, say it, and people will hear and understand. Then, you get on a plane and land back in Seattle, and no one knows what you just studied, what you went through, and how you’re intrinsically different. You’ll be home alone and find yourself talking to the walls, but the walls don’t talk back. No one understands your brain and the thoughts that you have. It’s quiet, it’s weird, and it’s lonely. Not only that, but everything in Seattle is exactly the same as when you left, and it starts to feel like maybe you didn’t change at all. Maybe you’re the exact same person you were when you left. It is brutally isolating.
It’s not all doom and gloom, and though it takes time, it does get better. A quote that helped me was from a philosopher, Heraclitus says, “A man cannot step into the same river twice, because it is not the same river, and he is not the same man.” The changes you experienced did happen, and while Seattle may be the same river, you are not the same person. Another thing that helped me was keeping in contact with my friends from the trip. Meeting up on occasion to discuss all the things you learned about that have now simmered and shifted allows you to tell someone who will understand.
Untold Now Told
So there it is. There’s obviously so much more, but those are the ones I was aching to tell and the ones I think are most important. I hope that when you apply to study abroad, you take these unspoken truths into consideration. I also hope they didn’t scare you away. Studying abroad has its pros and cons, but overall it really is an experience I would never change and would forever regret if I hadn’t pressed submit on my application. I hope you enjoyed my Quick Guide to Things Not Discussed and that when you go on your trip, you feel prepared to take on the world.
